Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Still Waiting for How You Raised Awareness....

I've had a few "words" on Facebook with friends who have invited me to play the latest "Breast Cancer Awareness Game" asking women to post a fake pregnancy status. My response to being invited to play this game is letting people know that I will not be participating in the game, and the reason this won't happen is because it is insensitive to the many women left infertile from their cancer treatments.

Of course if you do not have someone who has been left infertile from their cancer treatments it is easy not to realize the pain of that game. You're not a bad person and we all make mistakes. But, there are a handful of people that have challenged the insensitive part of the game by saying that they have cancer survivors in their family who are playing the game and that they are raising awareness of breast cancer so it is important to play the game. Well... I've watched these peoples walls... and I'm still waiting for the part when you raised awareness for breast cancer. Most of their walls look a little something like this:

Cindy: 18 weeks and craving pickles...
June: What??? Are you pregnant?
Sarah: Huh? Really!!!??
Michele: Ha ha ha, funny!
Hannah: Are you serious? Congrats!
Greg: No way!

And so on and so forth. K... so.... where was the part that you raised awareness for breast cancer? I guess I missed it. Was it in the chain email going around?

Ok pretty ladies, it's that time of year again, in support of breast cancer awareness!! So we all remember last years game of writing your bra color as your status?.....or the way we like to have our handbag handy?
Remember last year so many people took part that it made national news and, the constant updating of status reminded everyone why we're doing this and helped raise awareness!!
Do NOT tell any males what the status' mean, keep them guessing!!
And please copy and paste (in a message )this to all your female friends to see if we can make a bigger fuss this year than last year!!! I did my part... now YOUR turn !
Go on ladies...and let's have all the males guessing!
It's time to confuse the men again (not that its really that hard to do :)) Everyone knows it makes their brains work wonders on what we're talkin about!! The idea is to choose the month you were born and the day you were born. Pass this on to the girls only and lets see how far it reaches around. The last one about the bra went round allovr the world.
So you'll write...
I'm (your birth month) weeks and I'm craving (your birth date)!!! as your status.
Example: Feb 14th= I'm 2 weeks and craving Choclolate mints!!


Days of the month:
7-Dairy Milk
9-Peanut Butter Cups
10-Meat Balls
12-Bubble Gum
13-Hershey's Kisses
14-Chocolate Mints
16-Resse's Fastbreak
18-Cherry Jello
21-Creme Eggs
23-Gummy Bears
24-Gummy Worms
25-Strawberry Pop Tarts
27-Mini Eggs
28-Kit-Kat Chunkie
29-Double Chocolate Chip Chrunchy Cookies
31-Chocolate Cake

Nope... not really in there either. Seems to be more focused on playing a practical joke on the guys.

Instead of playing these silly thoughtless insensitive status games... try this instead... set up a monthly boob check buddy system with your girlfriends. Once a month post a status reminding each other to take time out of the day to check your boobs for any lumps or suspicious spots. Pick up some Feel Your Boobies kits. Take some time to look through the photo slideshow for The Scar Project to see real breast cancer survivors, www.thescarproject.org.


  1. Thank you for saying what was on my mind!

  2. No I don't want to know your bra size, no I don't care where your purse is currently located, and no I don't want to know your shoe size. I don't want you to keep it a "secret" from your friends, from your husband or from your boyfriend. For one hour, I want everyone who wants to raise some *actual* awareness to do ONE thing. Post one way *you* know of REDUCING the risk of breast cancer. " Breastfeed your children to REDUCE your risk of breast cancer!"

  3. Amen! I found it to be insensitive to anybody struggling with infertility, really. Although those days are fortunately behind me, I know how I would have felt had I seen all those pregnancy posts 3 years ago when I was. And doubly insensitive if the reason for the infertility was cancer treatments. Ugh. I like Mother Hen's response.

  4. Really? So Mother Hen....how are you raising awareness??? Showing everyone that you can breastfeed? Is that insensitive to the women who can't? Oh, that's right, there is no such thing as 'I can't breastfeed'. Now THAT seems quite insensitive! Facebook is full of 'games' and silly pictures.....why is it ok for you but not other FB users to post what they want? Kinda hippocritical since the post you are talking about comes from one of your own family members who you don't dare just say something to her....nope, gotta do this lillte blog-tell-all-self-rightous thing instead.

  5. Anonymous... simmer down. When have we ever claimed that there is no such thing has a woman not being able to breastfeed? I have *NEVER* said such words. There are real medical reason why some women cannot breastfeed, they are extremely rare, but they do exist. I have plenty of friends and family who have chose to formula feed, and I love them just as much as anyone who chose to breastfed.

    If you are a family member of mine, please talk to me about this instead of posting anonymously and angrily. This post originated from the thoughts of a random FB 'friend' who is on my clubbed foot support group. I don't believe I even saw any of my own family playing this game, and if I did see it I would have told them the same information I've been telling other people. This particular game is hurting women who are infertile and does nothing to actually raise awareness for breast cancer.

  6. In other words, IF you are a family member/friend of mine and you played the game and I didn't say something to you directly... I just simply missed the email or post on your wall. I have said something to every single person I've seen with it, and this post was not just some indirect way of informing you of my feelings. I have being going to people straight up, and most people have been very apologetic after realizing the pain that this particular game can cause another woman.

  7. Have to agree with Annoym here. Sorry but it is a silly facebook game. I played and you know what I check myself monthly AND ::GASP:: Even encourage my close friends and family members. Also have a feel your boobies kit. Am I not allowed to "play" Don't judge others without knowing.

  8. "I'm NOT going to fake a pregnancy, post my bra color, my shoe size, or where I keep my purse, in a vague and ineffective attempt to raise breast cancer awareness. What I WILL do is say that women who breastfeed greatly reduce the risk of breast cancer for themselves AND their child, and if anyone needs some support, help, and love in that area, you can always talk to me. Now THAT is what I call a helpful status about boobs \ ( . )( . ) /" via Woman Uncensored

  9. There are lots of blog posts out there of infertile cancer survivors who are terribly hurt by this silly game. If you don't care about hurting people, go ahead and continue to spread that game around. Or you could choose a more tactful and actual cancer awareness raising method as I suggested. I didn't tell anyone not to play the game, I just think that most people when made aware of the pain might consider a different route. I don't like making people cry personally.

  10. I didn't find this silly game on facebook to be rude toward those who are unable to get pregnant. I am one of those women who are infertile because of medical reasons, and I have tried for many years to become pregnant while all others around me seemed to get pregnant with ease(and I was very happy for each one of them). What I do find insensitive are those people who feel the need to ask me "how come you don't have any kids?" or "When are you going to get pregnant?", "Don't you like or want kids?" To me those comments are more insensitive then any game on facebook.

  11. Well, lots of people have found it rude and insensitive. It's hard to please everyone, but if ever I were doing something and then found out that it could be hurting someone - I would stop.

    The biggest point of my blog is that this game is supposed to raise breast cancer awareness... yet half of the people playing it don't even realize that this is what it is for... so... its not a very good strategy for raising BC awareness. There are much better ways to raise awareness. And yes, in fact, my showing breastfeeding and writing this blog are actually helpful. Many women have succeeded in breastfeeding thanks to my direct help, and now their chances of ending up with breast cancer are greatly lowered. Go me.

  12. Yes I totally agree with how dumb the game was to raise awareness about BC. I personally did not play it. And if I knew it had hurt someones feelings I would apologize. I guess I should have stated "I didn't find the silly game to be rude to ME". Also just wanted to put it out there that asking a women those kinda questions about why she doesn't have any kids is NOT OK either.

  13. Absolutely! It's a question I don't believe I've ever asked. I have a handful of friends who choose not to have children and a handful that cannot have biological children. I get it, and I see the pain. Thank goodness for adoption option if someone does want children, but I know the pain of not being pregnant will always be there.

  14. Its like that game about child abuse awareness and posting cartoons as your profiles picture. As someone who was survived abuse as a child, I was angry that anyone would think that a cartoon photo would raise awareness to child abuse. People should start donating time to a shelter or in this case a clinic or something instead of being lazy and filling their 'good deed' quotas for the day with a stupid FB mime that does nothing.

  15. Oh man, I've never seen that one... sounds horrible and stupid! :(

  16. I agree 100 percent..how about we actually say what we mean instead of play childish games that can remind others of hopes that were lost.