There have been many articles about the impact of our wired society on how we raise our kids. How many of us have been at the park with the kids, sitting on the bench watching them playing and reflexively picking up that cell phone to check to see if you missed a call or text, or to text someone and start a conversation, or browse the web, or make a phone call. I know I'm guilty. I'm also guilty of browsing and texting while I"m nursing...afterall, Chase is not a great conversationist. But why the almost COMPULSIVE need to be "connected" all the time?
|Texting while momming?|
So my New Year's goal (hate that term resolution) is to disconnect so that I can connect with my kids more. I'm going to unplug so i can be more plugged in with my little ones. It's going to be a hard habit to break, but I need to break it. Not only do I not spend enough time interacting with my 2-year-old who desperately needs me to be plugged in right now, I'm not paying a lick of attention when I'm nursing...I wonder how this will impact our nursing relationship...I need to engage Chase more at the breast, talk to him, meet his eyes, and play with his little hands. Afterall, who wants to have their face stuffed in a boob, right next to an armpit if no one is making it enjoyable?
How am I going to accomplish it? Well, it needs to be measurable, I need to make steps. So first off, the computer is going back upstairs where the boys nap....not downstairs where we play all day. This will reduce the drive-by-get-distracted facebooking I'm so guilty of. Since I won't leave Aiden downstairs for more than a few minutes at a time, that makes it enforceable...my toddler is effectively holding me accountable. As far as the cell-phone, I'm not going to take it to my nursing chair anymore. It can stay on the counter or table while I"m nursing so I don't have the temptation to browse the net or start texting when I should be talking to Aiden and plugging in to Chase. Computer time will be limited to simultaneous naps, which means Facebook is going to see far less of me, my doula board will see far less of me, and my e mail will see far less of me...but my KIDS will get more of me, the more of me that they deserve. What will I do instead? How about the dishes? A load of laundry (I could easily do 1 to 2 loads a day, if I have diapers, most days of the week) perhaps? Dusting? Coloring with Aiden or playing with his trains with him? the list goes on. This will make me a better mother I'm sure.
My concern is that part of the reason I do it is to connect with my friends...so to remedy this roadblock, I'm going to insist on more playdates...rotating homes is a great way to prevent constant huge messes, get out of the house, and get some mom-time while the kids get some kid-time.
What do you think about disconnecting to connect or unplugging to plug-in? What are your goals this year as they relate to your children, your life, your spouse, your home?